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I fired up Excel and specified the first three variables from which everything else was going to flow:Amount To Allocate: $6,700,000.Over How Many Days: Julia had suggested $500,000 as the top value. Linearly between $0 and $500,000 meant an average daily profit of $250,000, but I wanted a learning curve rather than linear, so the average might be closer to $350,000. That would need 19-odd days. So I started with an initial value of 20 in this field.Learning Ratio: I chose 5. This was how much better I wanted to seem to get. My last day's profit would be 5 times higher than my first day's profit, with the days in between interpolated.In the working area of the spreadsheet, I had the first column containing the day number, from 1 to HowManyDays (20). The second column was a "Base Amount", a flat allocation of the amount, AmountToAllocate / HowManyDays ($6,700,000 / 20 = $335,000).The next column was a little fancier. I wanted it to be a "Learning Factor", a factor that modified the. On the way home from school Friday I went to the grocery store with the check-out scanners and bought some Trojans, a three pack. It said ultra-thin and lubricated. I went home and Googled “how to use” and then slid one down my standing erection, carefully holding the tip and then stroked myself until I came in it. It felt odd, very strange, constricted, overheated, unpleasant. I knotted it and threw it away, sure two would be plenty for my onerous task. Saturday morning I heard the car start and drive away and there was my eager sister in her football jersey. My heart stopped, flittered and restarted, fast. “You ready `cause I sure am?” She pulled back the covers and squealed. “Oh damn. It’s beautiful. How’d you ever grow such a monster? Lord, I’ve never seen anything like it. How big is it?” I rolled over and hurried to the bathroom and pissed, relieving the pressure. When I got back, she was lying on my bed, smiling. “Come on, big boy, come and get it.” I tried to remember what to.
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